Christmas Music - Cheer or Torture?

I despise almost all traditional Christmas music.

In the Spirit of the Christmas Season ( and IT IS CHRISTmas, NOT “the holidays”) I thought I'd tell you about that particular quirk of mine.
ALMOST all of it. I still like one or two songs – one of them being “Oh, Holy Night.” The other depends on the mood I'm in, but trust me the list is short. No, I'm not the Grinch, but props to Jim Carrey for his outstanding portrayal of our green fiend. I especially love it when Jim, as the Grinch, does his Ron Howard The Director impersonation.

Anyway, traditional Christmas music has become so much audio vomit to me. Beginning November 1st, radio stations and store audio systems bombard us with every Christmas song ever conceived. Now, the NON-traditional stuff that's been composed since the 1950's or thereabouts, I can tolerate, and sometimes even enjoy. I particularly enjoy Black Sabbath's “I am Santa Claus” parody of their own song, “Iron Man.” I also like Al Yankovich's “Christmas at Ground Zero.” It's a little cold war era, but still funny. And of course, there's always “Grandma Got Run Over By a Reindeer.”

I can hear your chorus of “BOOOO!” from here on that last one.

Another point is why do the radio stations and the stores, and whoever else, still play songs paying tribute to the birth of Jesus Christ when they've done everything they can to take Him out of Christmas...oh, I mean “The Holidays.” Doesn't really make any sense.

Now before you misquote me as shouting “Bah, Humbug!” from the rooftops, let me tell you that I absolutely LOVE Christmas, despite the music. Christmas is the one time of the year when you can be both creative and sneaky, and no one will think you're crazy. They'll know that you're just another Christmas Shopper! Christmas is the most fun when you have smaller children. They're grateful for EVERYTHING they get. They're not picky. As long as it comes in a box wrapped in shiny colorful paper with ribbons and bows, it's just got to be a good thing. And watching their faces light up in excitement when they see what's inside is priceless. It's also funny to watch them toss clothing gifts to the side like so much garbage. “Oh, a shirt and pants. Woopee. I'll just throw this over in the corner for now. On to the next present!!!”

And by the way, Santa DOES SO EXIST!!!

So Merry Christmas! And turn off that Bing Crosby Christmas Album! It's making me sick.