Slave No More

For 10 years now, I have been prescribed medication for my depression and anxiety. After that much time, the root cause for the medication is a moot point. However, the desire to do away with the handful of pills, not to mention the cost of said pills, I have to take every day grows.

The question is: Why? Why must medication become more prolific, and stronger, for a problem that seems to be stagnant, (although it IS persistent.) I’ve tried prayer. “O, God, please cure me of this disease.” Or words to that effect. At any rate, God will not cure me from this disease, because it is my “cross to bear.” Those of you familiar with the bible will get that one. I was once told by a man-of-God that I still highly respect, not to pray for me to be cured of the disease, but to pray for the day when I didn’t need the medication anymore. I didn’t really understand that until now.

But, what did depressed people do before all these fantastic expensive medications came along? I’m not talking about the give-them-lithium-and-electrocution-treatment-crowd. I’m talking about people like me and the majority of depressed people out there.

The day has come. I am going to attempt what may seem truly scary to those around me, but to me feels like the gateway to liberty. Three antidepressants, are one anti-anxiety medication, are going to be phased out of my life gradually over the next few months.

I believe there are natural, God-given substances found in nature than can effectively treat depression. I know for a fact that regular exercise, (preferably outdoors in my case) can help balance brain chemistry. Prayer and/or meditation have been scientifically shown to significantly reduce the amount of stress in a person’s life, if they’ll just take the time to DO IT. These are the weapons of my battle. These are the tools I will use to build a happier me.

The human body was never created to sit in a cubicle and type at a computer station all day. The human mind was never created to be a slave to what others want it to think – it was designed to come to decisions on its own. Television, video games, and yes, the internet, these are the culprits of the decline of our minds, bodies, and most importantly, our peace of mind and perspective on life. (MUCH more on this later.)

So, I will slowly, slowly, titrate down off my medications and onto natural substances to mitigate the symptoms of my disease. Call it what you will, I have faith that this will work. And faith may be the most powerful medication of all in the end. Exercise of the mind, body, and spirit will be a daily priority. If there seems to be no time, I will MAKE time.

I am the guinea pig here, people. Needless to say, DON’T TRY THIS AT HOME, especially if you are on medication for the aforementioned afflictions. I’m not a psychologist or psychiatrist, but I’ve been under the care of them for so long now, I can recite the causes, both chemical and emotional, of depression and anxiety in the human mind. If I didn’t have this experience, and the knowledge I’ve gained over the last 10 years, I wouldn’t even consider doing this. But the bottom line is, I feel like a slave.

As long as depressed people are told by doctors to take a pill made by a pharmaceutical company, (that can and will charge whatever they like for that pill) we are slaves to the capitalistic fantasies of a bunch of chemistry majors turned businessmen. As long as we are told by doctors, “there is no other way,” and we believe it, we are slaves to someone else’s educated guess as to who we truly are inside.

I refuse to be a slave any longer. And I’m willing to bet my life on the fact that I can break the chains and escape.